Week 8

Well, we got back on track last week going 8 - 6. No need to flip the picks this week as I've finally learned that this year in wacky-NFL-world underdogs win as often as favorites and players can be "feel-good stories" for "coming back" from self-inflicted absences from the game due to rape and cruelty to animals.

SPECTANDUM this week: I get through the column without mentioning text-messaging. Which makes my column more concerned with sports than ESPN!

For All Hallows’ Eve: a scary-ugly matchup in London. In the words of Martial: your face looks like it’s under water, Denver. Can’t say I’m sad to see Denver struggling…

SAN FRANCISCO -2 over Denver: The 49ers travel 5,371 miles one way to get to Wembley Stadium for their “home” game in London. Let’s put that in perspective. The Bengals will travel a total of 5,992 miles for all eight of their road games this season. Crazy thing about this game? The Niners are still in it for the NFC West.

DALLAS -6.5 over Jacksonville: Look for Jon Kitna and Dez Bryant to make the 30th-ranked Jags defense carry their shoulder pads.

FACTOID: Dallas linebacker DeMarcus Ware has a touchdown in five consecutive games. What??

Washington +2.5 over DETROIT: Detroit is favored in a game! The Lions may be scoring a lot of points but they can’t run the ball (31st in the league) and the Skins come to town with a balanced attack. Look for Matthew Stafford to light up the Skins’ dubious D until a late turnover dooms the home team.

NY JETS -6 over Green Bay: Before the season, this might have been considered a Super Bowl preview. Now, folks in the glorious Midwestern state of Wisconsin are scratching their cheesy heads and asking themselves: the Bears? No, wait, the Bears? Folks in Minnesota are just waiting for baseball season to start. Which is sad, cause it’s still October.

ST LOUIS -3 over Carolina: Is anybody not rooting for Sam Bradford, Steven Jackson, and the St. Louis Rams at this point? Meanwhile Carolina is coming off their first win of the season last week, so look for the worst-in-the-league Panthers to get back to normal. Sam Bradford throws 2 TDs and a pick, which should be plenty.

Miami +1 over CINCINNATI: The Dolphins are the underdogs this week? Man, those Fins fans have got to be pissed, and the Bengals are a nice AFC North substitute for whom the refs won’t rig games.

KANSAS CITY -7.5 over Buffalo: Last year during baseball season you could always boost your Streak for the Cash by picking against the (Pre-Strasburg) Nats. The Bills are this year’s (and every year’s) Nats. But man, oh, man, what an effort last week against the Ravens, whose defense is declining in ways we’ve never seen since Benedict Modell picked up his skirt and skipped off to Poe-town.

Tennessee +3.5 over SAN DIEGO: We’re at the midway point of the season, and that means the pundits have picked out which coaches they want fired. So far San Diego’s Norv Turner headlines that list, which includes both Josh McDaniels and Mike Singletary (whose teams travel to the UK), the Cowboys’ Wade Phillips and, surprisingly, the 5 - 2 Ravens’ Jim Harbaugh. Meanwhile Tennessee did just what I said they would last week, and with Vince Young back in the lineup, look for Philip Rivers to get his first career loss to the Titans.

Tampa Bay +3 over ARIZONA: Tampa Bay is better than Arizona in just about every significant statistical category. And Arizona is being outscored by an average of over ten points per game. And Tampa Bay gets points in this one. Where do I sign?

Seattle +2.5 over OAKLAND: This matchup will feature two rejuvenated running backs in Marshawn Lynch and Darren McFadden, so look for these teams—which have had inconsistent quarterback play—to commit to the run. Special teams play will be the wild card here.

NEW ENGLAND +6.5 over Minnesota: Poor Minnesotans. They sold their souls to the devil last year and there ain’t no Daniel Webster gonna come and bail out this Jabez Stone.

Pittsburgh +1 over NEW ORLEANS: Come on. New Orleans is favored here? Seriously? I know Brees is going to bounce back after last weeks Mangini-Ryan Radar Defense extravaganza (FACTOID-urum: we will see more of the radar defense around the league next season), but come on people. This is the Steelers. The best team in football. Look for the zebras to continue to step up their game for the new rules-immune bad boys of the NFL.

Houston +5.5 over INDIANAPOLIS: Who knows what to do here? The Colts, even at 4 - 2 (and third place!) have never looked worse this decade. But this decade is over and the Colts are finally letting us know that they’re done. On the other hand, the Colts are +38 and the Texans -14 in net points. Still, Peyton Manning is going to be throwing the football to a bunch of guys off the street and the Colts are going to have to start paying their debt to the football gods for quitting on all those perfect seasons.