Man Puts Off Life-threatening Surgery for Football

[No time to break down our embarrassing 5 - 9 record from last week while The Wife went 9 - 5. Back later to anticipate this week's What's Gonna Happen (out of town for the weekend).]

The Detroit News gives us a familiar tale (well, familiar to those of us who don't live on the glamorous Coasts) about a man who just plain loves his hometown team in a big game. According to The News' Francis X. Donnelly:

Detroit — Major Hester is a high-strung retiree with a bad heart who gets so wound up during Michigan State games on TV that he has to turn the sound off.

He was supposed to get a new pacemaker this week, which would have come in handy Saturday as he watches one of the biggest Spartan games in a few years.

...but instead he opted for the Spartans game, which was on at the same time. (Factoid: MSU's coach is just two weeks removed from a heart attack of his own. This kind of fanaticism can be blamed on the Dome-dwelling Lions, who punted last week instead of attempting a 50-yard field goal or going for it on 4th and 10 from the Green Bay 39 down by 2 points, to concede the game to heavily-favored Green Bay. Meanwhile, Josh Scobee was shocking all of Florida's panhandle to life with a 59-yard, game-winning field goal over the Let's-let-THEM-tell-US-when-they're-done Colts).

As a NE Ohioan, I know precisely what I and the family and friends I grew up with would do here. I mean, come on, what's the worst that could happen? I'll tell you: the worst that could happen would be if the Browns won the Super Bowl, and then... But you don't have to worry about this happening if you're dead anyway (unless you go to you-know-where).

(Yes, that is Hall-of-Fame-bound, I-just-got-off-my-month-long-vacation-as-punishment, above-the-law Big Ben pouring a handle of some apple juice-colored substance down that co-ed's throat. NOTE: pictures posted Feb. 1, 2006. Think about that.)

Seriously, though, I almost wanted to respond to this article with, "If you told me the Browns were going to be in the Super Bowl, I would not only put off potential life-saving surgery for a day, but I would let you give me life-ENDING surgery." Almost. I mean, come on, I'm covered because I believe that if I'm a good boy then after I die I get to go to a place where the Browns WIN the Super Bowl.

But we're here to talk about the honorable Major Hester. As my brother-in-law (a Steelers fan) would say, "Helluva man!"